Parental Influence

As children, your parents and family in some form or fashion influence everything you know. Most children want to be “just like” mom or dad when they grow up. Girls play with mom’s jewelry and make-up even if they have to sneak and do it. Both boys and girls put on mom or dad’s shoes and walk around in them. And one day…you grow up and realize you actually do not want to be anything like your parents at all!!!

As adults, we tend to discover our own paths, but there are still a few reminders of what we learned from our parents, especially when it comes to relationships and marriage. Some of us will use our parents’ influence wisely, regardless if it is good or bad, while others will use it as a crutch. Hadley, Terry’s oldest daughter from the movie The Upside of Anger, did not let her parents influence her decisions when it came to relationships. She dated, married and had children of her own. She could have easily thrown in the towel because the original thought was her father had left her mother for another woman. Fortunately, she did not let her parents’ issues dictate her love life. Will you?

Marital Satisfaction or Self-Gratification

According to census.gov (http://www.census.gov/population/socdemo/marital-hist/2004/Table3.2004.xls), in 2004, 53.6% of men ages 25-29 had never married; 41.3% of women ages 25-29 had never married. The percentages decreased, of course, between the ages of 30-34 for both men and women, and I questioned that. Is it really because both men and women have developed true self identities, established themselves financially, and are ready to love someone for the rest of their lives and start a family with them, or is it because they feel they are getting too old and need to hurry and find someone?

Is it martial satisfaction young adults are wanting or self-gratification? As I stated in a previous blog, I was proposed to twice this year. To be honest, one of those men asked me to marry him December of 2007. Well, he was married on this past Friday. LOL!!! I talked with him and it seemed he couldn’t tell me anything about his fiancé; nothing but he was excited about getting married. That troubled me, so I prayed for him. He once told me he was “getting older and needed to settle down.” (I don’t take marriage lightly!) My aunt and I discussed it because I believe I went into shock! Was this not the same person who just proposed to me in June (3 months ago) in front of my family!? Okay, so I’m off of my soapbox now. She informed me that he was “simply on a mission, he just wanted a wife.” Is that a self-gratifying reason for marriage…