Its seems that "love at first sight" lasts about 5 minutes, almost literally these days! How many of you know at least 1 couple who married in their early twenties, and was divorced before their thirties? Please, answer quietly-I'm afraid of the number. According to Erik Erikson, young adults should "try out new relationships and attempt to find a way to connect with others in new ways while preserving their individuality." However, it seems most young adults try out these new relationships after marriage. This process is usually called "dating", which typically comes before marriage.
Are you wondering if I'm bitter? No! Not bitter, just confused and frustrated. If you think you're not ready for marriage, then why do it? I was with a man for 6 years and engaged to him for two of those years, but I quickly learned I wasn't ready during our premarital counseling. Thank GOD! I don't feel as though those were wasted years. Simply put, those were years for developing wisdom. Had I married at 21 I would be divorced now as well. However, I have no regrets of the things that "were". Divorce is something that does not only effect the two direct parties, but those around them as well such as children and other family members. What happened to "for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part"? Are vows not sacred anymore?
There are some states, such as Louisiana, that allow couples to opt for what's called "Covenant Marriage"; meaning, the couple receives premarital counseling first, and cannot divorce as easily. In some cases, such as "I no longer want to be married because my husband snores at night", this does not seem to be a bad idea.